I would have at least made out with you if you were showered.
Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
I just watered my plants with apple juice. Look what you made me do.
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
We agreed to not shave eyebrows when someone is passed out. douchebag.
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
I had a really bad dream about us drinking this weekend. Remind me to tell you Friday when we start drinking
His cat just sat there and simultaneously bobbed his head up and down while I blew him
My last one night stand called me today. Apparently I gave him a yeast infection in his mouth. Not sure how I should feel about this.
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
