it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
I told the girl in his bed not to bleed on his sheets like the last one.
He said he got laid, but you and i both know he was too high to leave his house.
I have your car and your sandals. My shoes are somewhere under the puke couch. Safari time.
He will. He has no choice. What's he gonna do? Find a better fuck buddy? We both know that's not possible. I'm the ideal friend with benefit. Minus snoring and uneven tits.
Got stoned and went to Walmart. For some reason a preacher walked up and asked if I knew the lord so I just yelled "I CAN FEEL HIM IN MY VIENS" at the top of my lungs. he left after that.
And then my hands went numb and no one believed me so I started putting peoples cigarettes out on them. Shitty idea i'll tell you that much
I just fully woke up, never smoking that much weed again. I had stress dreams about your house being surrounded by a lake and we kept losing our cars in it.
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
I AM GONNA CUM EVERYWHERE TONIGHT BRO.
I came twice and when I was done I petted his head and said "you did good kid you did good" and just laid back smiling. Tell me I'm not awesome.
I’m gonna stop you right there. The last time you had a “brilliant” idea, I woke up to my kitchen covered in flour and a javelin through my tv.
Randomize
