Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
we lost you for like an hour and then found you at some dive bar trying to teach dance lessons
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
Her grandmother had a handicap stair lift. I just put her drunk ass on it and let her ride it up. Thank God for broken hips.
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
I legit measured his penis against my chapstick and it was too close to call. So that was my night.
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
Randomize
