Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
true best friends attempt to put quarters in each others butts. Thanks for the best birthday ever!
i'm in his bathroom *freshening up* and he not only has a hairdryer... but a straightener. get me out of here... NOW
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
Life lesson learned last night, if you are too drunk to use the atm leave the strip club
I feel compelled to tell you that I woke up this morning and found an entire corn on the cob in my purse. Ive decided not to question my drunken behavior anymore, and to just accept it as my lifestyle.
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
She just tried to talk over a fart. The fart was way longer than the sentence she originally wanted to say so she just added gibberish to the end. Gross
I ate shit on a rock, and when I got up this car full of people asked me if I was okay, and I just sprinted away screaming "I am a banana!"
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
Randomize
