And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
No, you can still breathe under the balls.
we hooked up on one of my student's desks last night...i can't decide if i'm ashamed or massively proud of myself
dude you teach first grade wtf
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
You rolled over grabbed my crotch and said "that's my waffle." I'm sleeping on the couch next time.
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
Randomize
