No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
Just bought a beer belt to complete the Captain America outfit. I will do my part as a hero of America to pass out beer to the good citizens of America.
I started singing the national anthem on a train in London. Happy 4th of July assholes
The cops forgot your handle of tequila when they took you away. Taking shots in your honor amigo
I'm not driving across town for three thrusts and an excuse
Yo if you blacked out last night, careful going through your purse. There's cocaine in a lollipop wrapper.
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
You can either drink his whiskey or be a bitch. Doing both is just mean.
I wish I could open myself up and check on my liver. Make sure it's hanging on. Ya know?
Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
Randomize
