You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
You just compared our sex life to a seven year old kid.
I hope the prosecutor is a dude cause my lawyer is hot.
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
he aplogized for the shitty sex and called me "ma'am" when he did it. And he wants redemption sex. Gah I love southern gentlemen.
He doesn't fuck you and he's married, why do you keep letting him cum all over your stomach?
In the hopes he'll just put it in one day?
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
Roommate just came in drunk and tweaked out because my tv has a DVD player built in. Waaaaaayyyy too sober for that conversation.
HOW THE FUCK CAN YOU NOT REMEMBER WHIPPING IT OUT AND PUTTING ON THE BAR?
By the way, you're banned for life.
I'm about to turn myself in when I'm less hungover.
Tonight I'm getting fucked up for America because Lord knows we need it.
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
Randomize
