is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
no you cant smoke seaweed
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
I just sneezed cum. He better have a damn good day at work.
HOW LONG TILL THESE DRUGS WEAR OFF. I WORK IN ONE HOUR, I REPEAT, I WORK IN ONE HOUR.
I made a bet with her that she would show me her tits if I finished my beer. Only on spring break.
We definitely need to avoid these "I'm gonna get stabbed if I stay here any longer" partys
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
Nothing like hearing "I found your pinky nail" before you even noticed it was missing.
the cops are being surprisingly chill about david hanging from a tree with no pants.
I woke up on a boat next to an extremely attractive man wearing nothing but a life jacket. Neither one of us owns a boat...
Best part about losing weight and not fitting into your pants any longer? They come off quick for chipotle emergencies.
Basically I think I'm replacing men/sex with theme parks.
'allo, good sire. how dost thy day goeth?
oh no. you're at that weird Renaissance Festival thing again, aren't you?
I am an inebriated elf. you may fucketh off.
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
Randomize
