Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
Did you see that girl I got with last night?
Girl? Oh...weird...to be honest Ive always thought you were gay..
If you die in college, do you die in real life?
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
Managed to convince my mom that I had been home for 3 hours sleeping on the couch downstairs and this t-shirt was your dads. I am SUCH a fucking boss.
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
Just got caught staring at a woman breast feeding. My only response was, "She's so adorable".
She was purple for Halloween. She literally spray-painted herself purple and called it a costume. It won't come off.
I also love my swipe to text changed a singular vagina to a plural vaginas. like my phone somehow knows I secretly want 2 vaginas
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
My dad told me to bring weed to easter Sunday dinner..
Woke up at my x's house. He said I talked about how much I love panda's for fourty five minutes. Then made him watch The Little Mermaid with me. Made the walk of shame infront of his mom. Things can only really go up from here.
Wait till you get home.
Well I didn't spend $7 on an Uber just to get limp dick
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow
She told me to take deeps breaths and I said I said YOU FUCKING TAKE A BREATH CAROL IM SURE IF YOU WERE IN MY POSITION YOU WOULD HAVE OFFED YOURSELF ALREADY and she said my name is Becky 😂
Randomize
