I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
I was just told by a cop that my party was the most epic party they ever crashed
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
You left a trail of sequins from your dress incase we got lost
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
theres a new barista at starbuck holy fuck she's hot
i want to face-plant into her vagina
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
He wants to buy me a wedding ring and pretend to be married to someone else when we fuck. It actually makes me wet thinking about it.
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
Howd last night go?
well he stumbled in my parents door drunk and then asked my mom if she was my grandma. Id say as far as first impressions go, he failed miserably
Watching South Park, doing sit-ups and drinking tequila. In other words, my night is going pretty good.
Randomize
