The jonas brothers playing in your laptop. This is why guys won't sleep with you...
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
It's not weird mascara. I just have puke crusted on my eyelashes.
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
I can't wait for the 4th. I'll probably get drunk and end up puking all over whichever 18 year old I end up making out with.
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
The bartender was shocked when I took the mop bucket from him and told him I'd take care of my friends puke.
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
Can someone please remind me later tonight that there's a taco in my purse. I may get drunk and forget I put it there
i can believe you didnt get any, i was wing-girling the shit out of him
all you did was repeatedly scream GET IT IN
Smargarita sloshedurday tomorrow around 2
Bring a helmet for your liver
i told someone my fallback plan was to be a slutty bartender and i needed the practice as i straddled them to pour a shot
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
How was your day?
Peaceful. I left the house to get paid and get fried chicken.
Randomize
