I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
just went to the store to buy a mop & tampons. i feel like i just gave in to all those women jokes.
So basically i got outta bed and started peeing on the a/c unit..when my roommate tried to stop me i looked at him and said "i got this"
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
"Grocery shopping" is really just a euphemism for spending $20 on enough frozen food to last 2 weeks and spending the rest of your viable paycheck on alcohol.
And that's the fourth pair of yoga pants with unwashable stains from you.
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
We had sex on a lawn chair while fireworks were going off last night. It was unavoidable that I got mosquito bites all over my ass
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
His cat must have been laying on his dick, because now my face is covered in hives
Yeah started playing at the wedding last night, when the line. "Ludacris fills cups like DD" he starts pointing at my tits right in front of his grandparents.
I asked her how many times she came and she said "Oh god I can't count that high, Rutgers doesn't teach us that."
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
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