Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
he thanks me after handjobs.
you found the perfect man.
I'm pretty sure I just overheard my boss call his sperm precious metal...
He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
I knew it would get worse when I said I think your roommate is watching and he looked over at him and said ... So?
I just realized that I have to choose between a future orthopedic surgeon and a dude currently in jail. My life is so fucked.
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
Well I smoked some weird shit and I think I peed on my phone.
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
She dry humped my leg in the raw while I was still dressed, came, and then fell asleep on top of me. All I got was a bruised thigh. 2020 needs to end.
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
Randomize
