Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
Say "Steve Buscemi is hot." with a straight face.
Glad I put on jeans. You could measure my ass sweat with a rain guage.
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
I think im gonna have to stop sexting on the metra. The middle aged businessman behind me just leaned over and whispered 'dirty girl' and highfived his seatmate.
You better fuck one or both of those bitches and bring me pictures that will make me uncomfortable
I can do at least one of those things.
Trying to convince myself that everyone keeps staring at me because I'm pretty and not because of my hickies.
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
I'm highly inebriated watching star wars, this text was sent via the force
I don't care if he's the coolest coworker, if he's living in his mom's basement at 30 you should not buy drugs from him
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
I'm sorry I couldn't bail you out, apparenty they dont take credit cards over the phone. Did you at least make any friends in jail?
Randomize
