I figured girls wouldn't be down to sleep w/ a guy who plugged a pregnant chick
The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
Too lazy to make dinner. Had chocolate and scotch instead. Check in with me in a half hour.
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
Remember when I got my car stuck in my backyard?
You said you wanted to wrap his dick in a tortilla and make a spicy burrito. Let me just say, most girls don't have this hard of a time getting laid.
There's nothing worse than carrying your fairy crown and wings home wearing fishnets
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
I left myself a note saying 'buy a hamster but not an orange one like this pen'
omg so drunk
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
Randomize
