you know its bad when everytime i put on a shirt i think of who i hooked up with in it
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
She said if her future children dont have blue eyes she wont love them
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
It says a lot about the way my life is going right now that 'there's no shit in your house' is fucking good news.
How many more of your relationships do I have to destroy before you realize sleeping with me isn't a good idea?
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
Randomize
