So the D.A.R.E. essay I helped my tutor kid write won an award. Oh the irony.
you're acting like its my fault you're allergic to sperm or something.
i told you we never speak of that again
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
Although I wish I was out drinking, this cough syrup has me slightly more optimistic than usual.. I heavily debating trying to find mystical creatures and selling them to rich people as pets
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
How does one take the "you're the best sex I've ever had but I'm marrying someone that's sub-par in the sack" mind fuck?
I pity the fool.
Thanks Mr T.
I've made a new rule for socializing in the winter: if it doesn't involve me orgasming or getting drunk I can't make it
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
Randomize
