Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
Think I just subconsciously wanted a cigarette and started sleep walking to Carl's.. Didn't realize what I was doing until I found myself in an elevator.
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
He offered me a trade. He'll come sober to my parents 25th anniversary dinner if I let him tie me up for an hour.
Update. bondage is a lot harder than it looks.
Stop studying come to the bar get drunk and help me figure out how to get home pretend there are commas in there someplace
And if you put this on Facebook, I will drop live cockroaches in your mouth while you sleep and then smother you with a pillow.
You always say the most romantic things
I brought those bastards cookies so they can deal with my sex noise, fuck them and their roommate asses
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
i woke up this morning with a fake eyeball in my pocket
A reminder in my phone just went off saying, "Fuck.On.Roof- the Great Bambino". This makes me excited and slightly nervous.
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
Randomize
