ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
i spent 15 mins trying to take money out of ATM with my drivers license saying, "what the fuckkkk" everytime it didnt work
I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
I was preparing to do my walk of shame shirtless, but then I found my sweater, wallet and keys neatly piled under a tree in the park.
He bought me a oreo ice cream cake with "thanks for not calling the cops!" written in icing. If that doesn't sum up winter break, I don't know what does.
You sent me a picture of you holding a goat then asked me if I would have day sex
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
HEY JUST FOUND A SHIT TON OF MONEY IN THE PURSE HE SENT BRB GONNA GO BUY ME SOME MALE STRIPPERS AND BATHE IN THESE TWENTY DOLLAR BILLS
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
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