her vagine was all disorganized.
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
He kept telling me how extraordinarily clean my ears were.
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
Are you feeling okay?
Right now, not a single thing feels even slightly okay. That hungover.
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
when I was walking home I wad so excited to see a cat on the sidewalk but it was really a traffic cone
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
Day drunk. He was sitting in the back seat, opened the door, leaned out, and peed right there in the dutch bros drive through. No one even noticed haha
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
yea i'll help you find a man. but, when I say jump, you say on who.
Randomize
