I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
I HOPE YOURE READY TO KICK SOME SERIOUS ASS AT TRIVIA NIGHT TOMORROW NIGHT. also, i hope the birth of your niece goes well. BUT MOSTLY TRIVIA NIGHT.
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
I feel like a drive thru vagina
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
Is there a reason drunk me put drunk you's phone in the freezer?
I wonder how horrible I look to customers. There's cuts all over my face and I can't talk.
What are the cuts from? Head-butting the bathroom light fixture?
Honestly that's best case scenario.
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
If you can throw 105 mph it’s mandatory that you’re hung.
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
Randomize
