Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
Thoughts of banging the girl who just opened my beer with her teeth?
Omfg amy I'm not kidding you I think a blow job is what landed me in the hospital
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
Don't judge them too harshly for getting kicked out of a strip club. Happens to the best of us.
You are the coolest girlfriend ever.
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
We're going to watch the inauguration and fuck. Or fuck and watch the inauguration, I'm not picky, just get your ass over here by ten.
Randomize
