Is it normal to miss your booty call?
So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
How do you say "I always respond to booty calls" when you give a guy your number?
I thanked her dad for "firing off a good one" when she was conceived. She said thats why he doesnt like me.
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
Ah, drunk me ordered sushi at 3 a.m. for sober me's lunch the next day. EXCELLENT
I just thought about how many drinks I had last night and threw up.
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
He offered to dress his dick up as Charlie Chaplin to cheer me up.
Keep him.
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
It feels weird going to sleep without hugging the toilet goodnight
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