would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
i grabbed his hand and told him i loved him and then he looked down and said "i love...mallomars" and shoved like three in his mouth. never been so embarrassed.
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
Oh nbd. She just had sex with a divorcee. On a charter bus. At 10 a.m. On a Thursday.
I'm so in the Halloween spirit, I zombified my all of my nudes on my phone. Tell me this isn't creative.
I stole a fireplace last night.
Of dear god, I've been waiting to have rug burn like this since I got bored of my vibrator 2 months ago
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
Do you want to talk about dinosaurs?
Wine through a straw in a subway cup.....classy
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
My FIANCE just told me he thought you were the prettiest out of all my friends YOU WHORE
Randomize