my periods are so regular now that they are sync-ed with my subscriptions of vogue.
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
you kept saying 'can i put my penis on the grill?' and it was all i could do to stop you. you're welcome, though
this will be a night to untag.
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
Your subconscious sucks. Mine is awesome. I have a recurring dream where I manage a chocolate factory run by big titted hookers.
A) you're a liar. B) that would be awesome.
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
This is the third year in a row that Mario has fallen through a table on New Years. I'm sensing a tradition developing.
Woke up in bushes at UT didn't know I was Austin last night
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
A reminder in my phone just went off saying, "Fuck.On.Roof- the Great Bambino". This makes me excited and slightly nervous.
Randomize
