Quick, to the slutcave!
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
people are starting to question the shark bite story
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
So my grandma sent me a valentines day present of waterproof mascara, tissues, and chocolate. Way to reinforce that I'll be single and depressed on valentines day. Thanks grandma.
He asked me where I wanted it. I told him in the condom. He stops mid thrust and says "you're no fun" and then blew. Chivalry is semi dead.
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
Apparently you need a permit for a flamethrower.
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
He said he looked out his window and I was sitting in the grass with blood everywhere talking to a dog.
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
- I'm finally learning to be functional when I'm high. I feel like this is a milestone.
Unless my dick prospects improve this year’s Halloween costume will include panties with “DTF” written on them and a push up bra
Randomize
