just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it
only you. it could only happen to you.
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
I like how the only thing you spelled correctly is "i'm tequila"
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
On our way there. Drinking my beer out of a coffee pot. Cuz it's my bday
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
omg i wish you could see the front of my car.
There's literally a dust print of your body and your arm trying to hold on and the other one where your fingers visibly dragged down the hood.
You don't even know. The entire marching band thinks I'm an alcoholic.
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
You tell anyone I'm rocking out to Pitbull in an economy, base-model car, I'll kill you.
Dude, she stopped mid blow job to ask the cat's name. ADHD might be a deal breaker after all.
Randomize
