id be glad to
Hot mess moment: I just made really spicy guac and picked my nose, which set it on fire. I tried to neti pot it with a coffee pot, which resulted in me gagging and puking all over my bf's bathroom. oopsie.
You put your red cup in a chain link fence and kept telling me you could use it as a telescope
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
You fell asleep with your fingers in my vagina. You made this a relationship.
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
After you puked in the bathtub you claimed you were never eating quesadillas again and you never even ate a quesadilla
Pretty sure I just got the ok to have a one night stand in Maui...from mom. I'd say that's a win in my book.
woke up this morning to a baggy full of adderall and two redbulls..i'm gonna marry this guy one day
Randomize
