Can I come over?
Can't... I'm at class right now.
No your not
I'm outside by your car.
I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
so high driving around just saw a woman in a pink shirt chillin riding a horse
so high at work that a 35 year old with his kids handed me visine and winked at me. you win with the horse though
I don't hate you. My dick is upset with you, but I don't hate you.
somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.
hey..i found a takeout box with a half-eaten hamburger in it, the box said to text this number if found...
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
Would it be safe to assume you're the one that left my front door wide open and left yourself a trail of jaeger drops to find your way back?
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
Thank you for dog sitting, there is $60 on my desk to be spent on DRUGS AND/OR GAS ONLY not that food stuff people crave.
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
Went to waffle house after dropping my sister off at school and got into a heated argument with a drunk/hungover philosophy professor I will not name. I won the argument.
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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