I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
I went outside for a smoke at 4 and things seemed normal. It's 6 now and the front lawn is COVERED in tortilla chips. WTF?
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
She told me a motorboat isn't successful unless they come out gasping for air. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!!!
My goal is to go an entire semester without cocaine. That's an adult goal right?
I live vicariously through you. No one mistakes me for a hooker anymore. I look like a stay at home mom of three. On bad days of four.
He literally wrote out a schedule. On it, there's a taco break, and a spot where I start crying.
I'll be there with bells on. And by "bells" I mean "jäger bombs". And by "on" I mean "being poured down my gullet".
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
You literally chaperoned my booty call.
Remember last NYE when after the 9th shot of tequila you went on full crazy mode and made out with the 50 y/o doorkeeper? and he called you the next day?
Do you think the hole in the ceiling will count against our security deposit?
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
Randomize
