Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
The best time of year to be high is WHEN THE KING CAKES ARE HALF OFF BECAUSE MARDI GRAS IS OVER YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH
I won't go into too much detail about this but you should probably wash your sheets. In bleach. Or just burn them. Thanks for letting me sleep in your bed bro. Enjoy scotland.
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
Everyone looked at me like I just fucked a gopher and was wearing it like a hat
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
I woke him up with a blow job and he started sing "oh the USAAAA. IT'S GOING TO BE S BEAUTIFUL DAYYYYY"
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
He makes balloon animals that get you high? Hell yeah invite him over!
I'm owning this being a social human being thing tonight!
Mixing Powerade and white wine has been one of my better ideas.
You know it's NBA season when you compare head to 3 pointers.
IT'S PERFEFT
... what?
HIS DICK. IT'S PERFECT. BYE.
Also, in case they didn’t tell you… there is a chicken living in your old room… so I would assume cleaning that is now on them
Randomize
