And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
i don't think my family understands the severity of a twenty first birthday.
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
you described his penis as a "portable fishing pole"
You ordered 6 boxes of pizza and laughed in the pizza guys face when you didn't pay for any of them.
I took shrooms last night.. For a good half hour I genuinely believed I was black and being held captive by a leaf. Never again.
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
im lying in bed trying to choke myself out because being awake hurts too much
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
I've been here 20 minutes and a sweaty naked man has kissed me on the cheek.
That's a gentle way of saying I passed out like an 18-year-old on his first trip to Tijuana
He eats kale on the regular. Do I look like a bitch that wants to eat kale. No. Give me some Boston market.
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
she was just meowing in the corner eating frozen chicken nuggets
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