I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
i told him he had the best dick i've ever seen. then supposedly i kept repeating "peter piper picked the perfect penis"
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
i feel as if last night was a right of passage. to officially be an adult you must have a drunken one night stand with a co-worker and go to work the next day still drunk wearing yesterday's clothes...
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
I hope the walls stop moving before my manager notices that i'm still drunk.
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
my underwear is inside out , I have a giant hickie. I'm wearing last nights makeup. this is going to be the best day at work ever
Btw, apparently no one knows who ordered the pizzas for the after party, no one paid, and the delivery lady made a celeb shot, took a beer, then said she'd be back later to finish up the game...
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
It’s easy for me to be professional, the tough part is finding the perfect amount of bitchy undertone
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