my mouth tastes like poor choices
so the guy behind me in court for my DUI hearing got a DUI on a lawnmower at 1AM...he is my new hero
ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
I was so exhausted I thought about using my deep throat spray to stop my coughing.
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
You proceeded to get into a playground school bus and yell "all aboard to Margaritaville!"
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
You bring me burritos. Of course I text you during sex
Was looking through my phone and saw that drunk me took a tit pic in the Denny's bathroom..
I woke up to some strange woman rubbing peanut butter on my thighs
All I want is dick and wine.
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
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