Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
please bring me a paper towel asap.
I was drinking wine in bed and spilt some on my chest.. And I cautiously guided it into my belly button but now I dont know what to do.
Im sorry that my initial plan of you grabbing his dick didnt work out but Im glad you grabbed his heart
I was at that stage of drunk where it seemed appropriate to just make out with everyone. As like a greeting.
I hear you
His penis is small and he doesnt like Harry Potter. HE HAS NO REDEEMING QUALITIES WHAT AM I EVEN DOING HERE
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
I haven't taken a solid shit in four weeks. Do you know what started four weeks ago? Alcohol and dining hall food. Fucking college.
I've discovered my ability to crush a man's ego is greater than my hate for beer.
Can I just lay in bed and you pour vodka through a funnel in my mouth?
just yelled CURVEBALL at my nightie because it turned out to be a pair of shorts
His dog ate the vibrator. The WHOLE vibrator. We spend the morning after trying to make it vomit up the battery. Why does this always happen to me?
I puked on her cat, I think I should at least buy her breakfast
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