I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
Have you ever noticed how boring internet porn is after you cum? I can't shut my computer fast enough.
I'm so cold I just used my boobs to keep my face warm
The cereal milk was almost black, the bacon was still frozen and the toast was soggy. And that was BEFORE I puked in her lap.
Aren't you glad we're at the point in our relationship where I don't even ask why you're hiding in the cabinet?
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
Just saw Santa sitting on a restaurant patio drinking beer and using his free hand to gesture to cars that he's watching them
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
On NPR this morning, farmers are feeding weed to pigs. The result: pot bacon. Life just got better.
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
Oh my god I need an adult
Wait shit I am an adult
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
Randomize
