Whod you bang
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
hey, sorry about all the butter. I thought it was gonna help.
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
It's Wednesday. And it's about that time to remind everyone that my priorities from last weekend have not changed moving forward into this weekend.
Because nothing screams stable like yelling at a guy in a bar because last time you hooked up he stole your underwear.
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
It's rum buckets o'clock
How much weight does it take to launch a cat using a trebuchet vs the tension required for a catapult?
We both know we're cheating on one another. But our side pieces aren't as kinky as us...so yeah, we're still together. This is a fucked up relationship.
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
You have to commit to sexting. You can't just quit right after I send you pictures of my asshole.
Seriously, come on.
I feel like there's a picture of my ass on the internet right now.
I hate you.
Maybe life is about finding the person you DO want to cuddle with after they rail you like a porn star
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
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