Define "chronic" masturbator.
Last night I fell down in the street (I think in someone's vomit), cut my knee up, lost my moms necklace and my license, and had to walk back to the hotel.
I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
Just got a blowjob in her closet with two people sleeping outside in the room. I feel like the emperor of college.
Dude she flew me 1000 miles down to see her, broke up with me 7 hrs after arrival, and kicked me out with a week left til I fly home. Thank god college taught me how to shack up
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
...You tried to use your wallet to call her after you gave your cell phone to the cab driver as a "peace offering"
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
He bedazzled a shirt for me that said "best head giver" should I be thankful for the gift or concerned that he has a bedazzler?
I've got five complains from the landlord about she being too loud during sex in two weeks I'm marrying her
WHY CANT I FIND JUST A NORMAL DISNEY LOVING MAN TO PAINT WITH ALL THE COLORS OF THE WIND WITH!!
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