with your own penis?
genius idea. im gonna paint my penis green like the serpent of sex
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
I think I'm dead. Why did I think it was a good idea to hang from the banister while someone poured liquor into my mouth?
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
I wish drunk me wasn't so into manscaping. Or at least good at it. Either or really
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
I told my therapist about the other night and he actually whistled and said "wow that is not good."
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
It doesn't count as "finding the lesbian" if you fuck a straight girl!
Randomize
