piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
You totally drew a penis wizard on my closet that says "I travel for cock rock"
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
He caught a squirrel with his bare hands twice. Where do you find these people?
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
What can I say, I'm a giver.
Smoking up the homeless at 3am does not make you a humanitarian.
You don't want to cheat on your husband, you just want to fuck someone who isn't him.
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
Hey, I left a taco in your dishwasher.
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
When I woke up I was spooning with a block of cheese. Like, cuddling. Me and the cheese we nestling...
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
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