I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
Yea. I think between making the bride puke, feeling up the maid of honor, and sleeping with a bridesmaid. I did my part.
Oh boy...do i want the 'something you can tell your mom in 10 yrs' version or the 'Im gonna call you a whore but be proud' version?
The guy you hooked up with is asleep in the tub. I just pee'd and he said 'turn off the tap' before snoring again.
Ok. I am hammered I will admit it but my legacy needs to live and your the only woman that could spawn satan. We need to talk.
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
I think I'm done drinking. How did we end up partying at a frat house with my mom...
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
I've seen you go skiing on a Tuesday, but you think you're too good for TGI Friday's?
You threw up at the outdoor bar and it was pretty...astonishing just how much can come out of such a small human.
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
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