I didn't slap you in the face. TEQUILA slapped you with my hand...
Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
i guess i finally out drove tiger woods this morning..
Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
Shit. I'm running the whole hotel right now. The front desk girl had to run home because she left her vibrator on the counter and her brother, mom, and grandmother surprised her and are showing up to her place before she gets off work. This will end badly no matter what.
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
I think I broke my hip playing drunk ping pong
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn.
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
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