Umm went to talk to a client ended up seeing his semi erect penis. This is my life.
Believe it's possible to jerk off while watching the food network.
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
Just gave advice in krystal burger while holding and pointing with a corona to a 3 year old, told her to enjoy her stroller time while it lasts. The mom pushed her away fast.
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
Yah, I guess one silver lining is I'd never seen a full water cooler get thrown down a flight of stairs, gotta appreciate the little things
All i want to do is drink fuck and cry... you dont have to cater all three its more like the saddest choose your own adventure ever
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
I will forever remember this as The Great Jalepeno Cock Burn of 2014.
I'll pay you back with progressively deviant sexual favors.
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
Please don't explain what tea bagging is to my mother.
I know EXACTLY where things went wrong with her...I didn't use Cheetos as a wooing tool.
THERES A BEAVER CHASING ME, ANGRY BEAVERS IS FUCKING REAL DUDE
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