So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
Outta milk. Using rum instead for pancake mix. Drunk Thursday is a gooo
I'm taking it from the chunk of pizza I just pulled out my hair that we ate pizza last night?
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
You really realize what your life's become when you're sitting alone in the house crying in a santa hat and pjs getting stoned on christmas eve before noon.
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
you texted me "dude im face"
it sounded so right at the time
I've been drinking vodka for the last 12 hours at the beach and can't see straight and have awesome hair.
LIFE IS #1 SOMETIMES
If I don't go to Australia I'm using that towards a new car. If I do I'll use it to buy a koala.
You ran through a field yelling "I'm frolicking! I'm frolicking!" Then fell on your face. How is your nose today, doll?
I just found peanut butter between my boobs. This was for you.
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