Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
dude, i think i am in a porno. I was working out at the hotel gym and some chick was doing yoga and a guy comes up and says "good, now i know your flexible" then they started making out. WTF?
in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
I just rolled a joint with a page from On The Road by Kerouac. I have never felt like more of a hipster.
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty
If you don't remember anything tomorrow, this is to remind you that you asked me in secret to build a bobsled with you and re-enact Cool Runnings.
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
My ex just sent me a message asking if she could blow me, but only if we get caught by her new bf. If she promises to swallow I'm doing it.
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
I miss forts and drugs that made me believe in unicorns...
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
Randomize
