My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
I'll start drinking again when I know where I am
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
Just farted cum and thought I shit myself. Crisis averted tho
well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
I woke up pulling sunflower seeds out of my vagina. That kind of night.
he bit the head off a dead goose for 5 beers. this is my future boyfriend.
I feel like a fucked a broomstick last night. You get a gold star.
Totally just met the chick getting nailed in our lobby last night. Should I bring it up?
New brilliant plan: invite two random okcupid girls to the same bar at the same time, have them compete
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
I'm counting my small victories this morning. For instance, I haven't puked at work yet.
she stuffed her marc jacobs purse full of cereal
classy
Randomize
