is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
When I'm drunk i like to pretend my penis is zeus and instead of peeing i'm throwing lightning bolts into the toilet...it helps me focus.
My mom walked down and caught me drinking by myself, watching the nanny at 3:30AM. I had no idea what to say
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
you just kept yelling "siddle that plaza" til the cab driver said it back...
My fuck buddy took time out of his date with his girlfriend to text me happy Valentines Day.
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
I have to stop envisioning penises as dragons.
My mom just gave me my fake back to buy her more wine.
Figured out why that fly won't leave. It keeps buzzing through my weed smoke
Fly high, Fly.
No one parties "Full Karen". She once broke a couple up at the bar, ate the girl out in the bathroom and took the guy home.
Dude we smoked with a bunch of random stoners in a forest, then group hugged. It was the most magical thing we've ever done.
If you sleep with him I will stab you int the uterus with a pitchfork.
Prepare the pitchfork.
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
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