So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
Moan for me like Helen Keller
and i looked up. we had an audience...
Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
WTF WHY ARE YOU STILL NOT DOING A BEER BONG?! THE TOILET CLOG CAN WAIT
I usually don't buy birthday presents for my booty calls
But you'll make an exception
probably not
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
Just found a condom on my floor from last weekend. 2/2. The scavenger hunt is over.
I have vodka and explosives. For once, we can blow something up that isn't a blow-up doll.
Nothing says I love you as your fiancé bringing back home your drunk brother from his own stag party
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Randomize
