She said her name was "party"
I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
he said he wanted to butter my pancake. i thought it was sexual, but he went downstairs and made pancakes. i need to stop dating fat guys.
it glows. i had to have it.
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
I like that most of our conversations somehow end in us having sex for the good of our country
I was more concerned about the amount of mcdonalds fries on the floor around me than i was with my lack of clothes.
There's always time for handjobs
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
I'm looking forward to the release of my future best seller - "Three Words to Make Your Relationship 100% Better: Surprise Blow Jobs"
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
He jerked off some dude with a slice of Wonder Bread.
The sports guy?
Yeah. They claimed the bread made it hetero
Randomize
