Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
Sooo, his balls are like... bigger than my head...
"auto-tuned camel" is how i'd describe the noises she made
I think I may have appendicitis, but the house is like two blocks from the hospital so I'm just gonna go and drink anyway.
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
Almost just got kicked out of a bar because the locals spilled beer everywhere when we taught them to shotgun.
If you were wondering whether I accidentally FaceTime called the undergrad who works for me in lab during a particularly graphic blow job last night, then the answer is yes.
I have reverted to folding laundry while watching porn. how much sadder can my life get?
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
You're going to be mad because I got baked, but not that mad because I'm bringing home kfc.
Found sauce from last night's pizza rolls wedged under my phone case... While sitting in my 8 am class. What happened last night?
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
I have to start drinking water I have a drug test to fail at 1:40
Randomize
